I have a hard time keeping my hopes alive when it is so obvious
how far I have slipped from where I was. I just don't know what too do anymore. Looking at it from the perspective of 3 years as a preview to the rest of my life...........I have to be stoned out of my gourd in order to maintain any social function, is it worth it? No matter how hard I try I can't shake the feeling that I no longer provide any service to society or to the people that love me. The twine holding me in this world seems to fray more and more......
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